Escape to Paradise: Unforgettable Retreat in Ingiriya, Sri Lanka
Alright, buckle up, buttercups! Because I just got back from a whirlwind trip to Escape to Paradise in Ingiriya, Sri Lanka, and I’m still picking the sand (and maybe a few mosquito bites, let's be real) out of my hair. This isn’t your typical polished hotel review; this is the raw, unfiltered truth, seasoned with a healthy dose of 'holy-moly-that-was-amazing' and a dash of 'well, that could’ve been better.' So, grab your cuppa (or, you know, your gin and tonic – I’m not judging) and let's dive in!
First Impressions: The Journey & Accessibility - Or, How I Almost Got Eaten by a Tuk-Tuk
Getting to Escape to Paradise… well, it's an adventure in itself. Ingiriya isn't exactly on the well-trodden tourist trail, which is part of its charm, but it's important to factor in travel time. From Colombo, it’s a picturesque drive, mostly, filled with vibrant markets and… well, let's just say Sri Lankan traffic is a thing. (Accessibility Alert: While the hotel itself boasts facilities for disabled guests (yes!), the journey to the hotel might pose some challenges depending on your mode of transport and the specific route you take. I recommend contacting the hotel directly for detailed accessibility information about getting there – because trust me, navigating Sri Lankan roads on your own is a gamble).
Accessibility WITHIN the Hotel - A Sigh of Relief
Okay, so once you’re there, the accessibility within the hotel is a huge win. Elevators, ramps, and facilities designed with accessibility in mind – a real breath of fresh air. This is not always a given in Sri Lanka, so kudos to Escape to Paradise for making it a priority.
Rooms – My Own Private Paradise… Mostly
The rooms? Okay, let's get real here. I stayed in a… ahem… "premium" room, and it was lovely. (Available in all rooms: Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone (yes, really!), Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra-long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini-bar, Mirror, Non-smoking (thank god!), On-demand movies (couldn't figure it out, but hey!), Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale (seriously, who uses a scale on vacation?!), Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens.). It was CLEAN. Spotless. Like, I inspected the corners with a magnifying glass clean. (Okay, maybe I’m exaggerating slightly). The bed was enormous and comfy like a cloud. The blackout curtains were a godsend after those long, hard days of… relaxing. But the internet? (Wi-Fi [free] in all rooms! – yes, thank you, sweet baby Jesus!) was a bit… patchy. Sometimes I could stream without a problem, other times… well, let’s just say my Instagram feed took a vacation of its own. (Internet, Internet [LAN], Internet services) were also available, but… I’m a Wi-Fi gal. I’m not trying to plug in. I’m trying to live.
The Food – A Rollercoaster of Deliciousness (and One Questionable Soup)
Alright, let's talk about the food. (Dining, drinking, and snacking: A la carte in restaurant, Alternative meal arrangement, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Bar, Bottle of water, Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Room service [24-hour], Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant). The breakfast buffet (Breakfast [buffet]), was a real winner. The fresh fruit? Unreal. Seriously, I think I single-handedly depleted the mango supply. The Sri Lankan curries were divine. I'm still dreaming about the coconut sambal. (Breakfast takeaway service) was an option if I wasn't feeling the buffet – and that was nice. (Breakfast in room) option was there, and I’m certain they can whip up something for you. I also appreciated the fact they included all of the condiments. (Essential condiments, I believe it’s called).
(Alternative meal arrangement)? Definitely available. Just ask the staff. Their international cuisine was on point and they have a dedicated vegetarian restaurant. Everything was perfect. Except… the soup. Oh god, the soup. I won’t go into detail (mostly because I can’t even remember what it was supposed to be), but let's just say it wasn't my favorite.
Paradise Found: Relaxation & Rejuvenation - My Day at the Spa (OMG)
Now, let's get to the good stuff: relaxation. This is where Escape to Paradise truly shines. (Things to do, ways to relax: Body scrub, Body wrap, Fitness center, Foot bath, Gym/fitness, Massage, Pool with view, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]). I spent a glorious afternoon at the spa (Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom), and… wow. Just… wow. (Massage). I opted for the full body massage, and I swear, I floated out of there. The masseuse was incredible – she knew exactly where all my knots were hiding (and I have LOTS of them). The outdoor pool (Pool with view, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]) was stunning, overlooking the lush green landscape. The view alone was enough to melt away any stress! The sauna and steamroom were a nice touch, too. So, yeah, I pretty much became one with the spa for a good chunk of my trip, and I have zero regrets. Honestly, the spa experience alone is worth the trip. I could actually feel my blood pressure lowering with every single massage!
Cleanliness and Safety – Because, you know, 2024…
(Cleanliness and safety: Anti-viral cleaning products, Cashless payment service, Daily disinfection in common areas, Doctor/nurse on call, First aid kit, Hand sanitizer, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Shared stationery removed, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment). Let's talk about safety. They are on point. Very on point. I saw staff constantly sanitizing common areas, and the rooms were spotless. The staff? All trained. They knew their stuff. Hand sanitizer was everywhere, cashless payment was available (thank goodness), and they were even using anti-viral cleaning products. Feeling safe allows you to completely relax; the staff is properly trained in every aspect of safety protocol and, as a result, you feel like you are in good hands.
More Than Just a Place to Sleep - The Extras
(Services and conveniences: Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center). Beyond the usual hotel amenities, they offered a few surprises. The staff was exceptionally helpful, and the concierge was a wealth of information. Laundry service was efficient (thank goodness for dry cleaning!), and I found the little gift shop surprisingly well-stocked with unique souvenirs. The terrace was a lovely spot for a quiet drink, and the outdoor venue for special events looked fantastic. I was tempted to join one of the meetings (meetings?) but I didn't have the heart.
For the Kids – A Family-Friendly Haven
(For the kids: Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal). If you're traveling with kids, Escape to Paradise is a winner. They have babysitting service (a lifesaver!), kids' meals, and facilities designed to keep the little ones entertained. (I'm assuming they're good; I did not bring any children with me.)
Getting Around – Wheels and Waiting
**(Getting around: Airport transfer, Bicycle parking, Car park [free of charge], Car park [on
Indonesian Paradise Found: Arama Villas' Harum Dalu Villa Awaits!
Okay, buckle up Buttercups, because we're heading to The Retreat Ingiriya, and let me tell you, the itinerary is more of a… suggestion at this point. I'm operating on about three hours of sleep, fuelled by instant coffee and the sheer, unadulterated promise of spa treatments. Let's see how this unfolds, shall we?
The Retreat Ingiriya: A Slightly Chaotic Adventure (or, My Attempt at Zen, Unsuccessfully)
Day 1: Arrival and Immediate Meltdown (Metaphorically, of Course)
- 1:00 PM (ish) - Arrival at Bandaranaike International Airport (CMB): Okay, so, I'm supposed to be collected. Supposed to. I have a vague recollection of arranging a transfer. Did I? Did I actually remember to do that? The airport is a whirlwind of unfamiliar smells and enthusiastic taxi drivers. I start sweating. My luggage is… heavy. (Update: Managed to find a driver. He seems nice, smells faintly of cinnamon and… potential for adventure?)
- 3:00 PM (ish) - The Drive: The drive to Ingiriya is, according to the brochure, a scenic journey through verdant landscapes. My experience? A frantic scramble to keep my eyes open, a constant battle against highway fatigue, and an overwhelming desire for a nap. Oh, and constant beeping horns. This is Sri Lankan music in action.
- 5:00 PM (ish) - Check-in and First Impressions: The Retreat! It's… beautiful. Seriously, actually breathtaking. Lush greenery, a pool that looks like it's been pulled from a postcard, and a vibe that screams "Zen." My internal monologue, however, is currently screaming "Hungry!" and "Did I pack the mosquito repellent?" (I didn't.) The staff is lovely. I think I'm going to like this place… until the jet lag fully kicks in.
- 6:00 PM - Tea and a Brief Stroll (Emphasis on the Brief): They offered me tea! I think it was ginger tea. It was good. I need to check. It was so good! I went for a stroll around my villa. It was hot. I ended up back in the air conditioning quickly. Mosquitoes are circling. Time for a shower.
- 7:30 PM - Dinner: The retreat offers curated meals. This place is absolutely serene and gorgeous. The food they served us was delicious. We had a delicious rice and curry as a light meal. I think I can get used to this.
- 9:00 PM (attempt) - Meditation Session (and the Subsequent Nap): Okay, so I was really trying to embrace the whole "mindfulness" thing. Deep breaths! Focus on the present! Then, the yoga instructor started talking about the "inner child." My inner child immediately threw a temper tantrum, demanding a cookie and a cuddle. The meditation lasted about 10 minutes into a full-on nap. Pretty Zen, right?
Day 2: Getting My Zen On (Maybe?) and Embracing the Mess
- 7:00 AM - Attempted Sunrise Yoga (and the Cat's Intrusion): Another attempt at Zen. This time, I was actually feeling it! Until a very fluffy, very opinionated cat decided my yoga mat was the perfect napping spot. No, kitty. No. I, lost my ability to be Zen. It ruined my balance.
- 8:00 AM - Breakfast: A feast! Fresh fruit, eggs, and the strongest coffee known to man. This is the start of a beautiful day. I sat enjoying my meal.
- 9:00 AM - Ayurvedic Consultation: Time to have someone poke, prod, and analyze me. The doctor seems lovely, but the things she's telling me… let's just say my "Vata Dosha" is currently in a state of utter chaos. Time for some serious herbs. And probably more sleep.
- 10:30 AM - Herbal Treatment: I choose the Ayurvedic herbal treatment massage. It was heavenly. I am now putty in their hands.
- 12:00 PM - Lunch: Same amazing food as yesterday. I might get used to the rice and curry.
- 1:00 PM - Relaxation and Pool-side Indulgence: I am relaxing in the pool, and my skin is relaxed. The sun is beaming on me. The water is a refreshing, lovely.
- 3:00 PM - Cookery Class: A cooking lesson. I was a bit skeptical at first, I'm not the best chef, but I surprisingly did well. The chef was very hands-on and made me enjoy the entire cooking class! We created some amazing Sri Lankan dishes.
- 6:00 PM - Dinner: More delicious food! I'm actually so tired, I'm going to go to bed early tonight.
- 7:30 PM - Deep Sleep.
Day 3: Reflection, Departure, and a Moment of Pure, Unadulterated Chill
- 8:00 AM - Yoga and Breakfast: I woke up feeling refreshed. I decided to go for a walk and relax! I ended up eating breakfast outside, which was a great decision.
- 9:00 AM – Free time: I have free time to just relax and explore. I ended up going for a walk. I spent 1 hour relaxing. I think I need to sleep.
- 11:00 AM - Departure: Well, friends, It's been real, but I think I've managed to make it, I'm ready to head home.
- 12:00 PM - Airport I got there and got on my plane.
Final Thoughts:
This trip to The Retreat Ingiriya wasn't perfect. There were mosquito bites. There was a cat. There was possibly too much rice and curry in my diet. But you know what? It was exactly what I needed. A little chaos, a lot of relaxation, and a whole heap of delicious food. Would I go back? Absolutely. Would I maybe pack more mosquito repellent next time? Definitely. Would I try really hard to find that damn inner child of mine? Probably not. But hey, a girl can dream. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need a nap.
Escape to Paradise: Hotel Schongarten Garni, Germany Awaits
Okay, so 'Escape to Paradise' in Ingiriya... sounds dreamy. But is it *really*? (Let's cut the BS.)
Alright, alright, let's be real. Ingiriya. You're probably picturing turquoise waters and shirtless hunks serving you coconuts, right? Nope. Wrong continent, amigo. "Paradise" in this case is more... *rustic*. More dirt roads and less perfectly manicured beaches. Think: Lush greenery, a soundtrack of chirping geckos (seriously, those things are LOUD), and the occasional rogue chicken. It's charming, yeah, but you're not going to find a Starbucks. Get used to the idea of "island time" – which translates to "sometimes things take a while." My first impression? Overwhelmed. So. Much. Green. I felt like I'd wandered into a Jurassic Park sequel. Which, now that I think about it, would be pretty cool. Jurassic Paradise... hmmm...
The brochure promised 'unforgettable retreats'. What exactly makes it 'unforgettable'? (Besides the mosquito bites, hopefully.)
Okay, here's the thing. "Unforgettable" isn't always about rainbows and sunshine. Sometimes it's about the moments that crack you open. For me? It was the cooking class. I attempted to make a curry. Let's just say, the end result was... *unique*. My host, bless her heart, just kept smiling and refilling my chili powder. I was practically breathing fire. The taste? Intense. The memory? Priceless. And the best part? Laughing about it afterwards with the other guests. We're talking genuine belly laughs, the kind that make your face hurt. That's unforgettable. That's also probably why I went through a whole bottle of water after the meal, i still feel the chili burn in my throat sometimes.
What kind of 'retreat' are we talking about? Yoga? Meditation? Confronting your inner demons? (Spill the tea!)
Depends on the package! They offer a bit of everything. There's yoga, which I tried once. Let's just say my downward dog looked more like a collapsed pretzel. Seriously, my hamstrings are still screaming at me. Meditation sessions are also an option – perfect if you enjoy the sound of jungle insects as your zen soundtrack. And yeah, there's definitely room for some self-reflection. Being surrounded by nature, away from the distractions of city life... it forces you to confront your inner demons. Or, in my case, the mountain of laundry I needed to do when I got back home. But hey, progress is progress! I also spend my time looking around, there's are so much wildlife here.
Accommodation: Is it a luxurious resort, a cozy guesthouse, or a slightly questionable shack? (Be honest!)
Let's go with cozy guesthouse with a dash of "rustic charm." Think clean, comfortable rooms, maybe with a mosquito net over your bed. (Trust me, you'll want the mosquito net.) Don't expect a five-star hotel. Expect... well, the sounds of the jungle. And sometimes, the power might go out. And maybe, just maybe, a gecko might sneak into your room looking for a snack. But honestly? It's part of the experience! My first night, a HUGE moth landed on my pillow, i screamed like a little girl, but i somehow managed to get rid of it, and slept soundly on my second night.
Food! Is it all bland hotel fare, or actual Sri Lankan deliciousness? (Give me the inside scoop!)
Sri Lankan deliciousness, baby! Prepare your taste buds. Rice and curry is king, and it's a glorious kingdom. Fresh fruit is everywhere. The spices are *amazing*. I'm talking curries that dance on your tongue, things you've never tasted before. And the portion sizes are… generous. You will eat. You will be happy. You might even gain a few pounds. Totally worth it. The only downside? I had to watch my weight and tried to control my craving. It's impossible. Every meal was a culinary adventure.
Activities? What's there to *do* besides eat and contemplate the meaning of life?
Okay, so you *could* eat and contemplate the meaning of life, which is a perfectly valid activity. But there's more! Hiking is a big one – the views are breathtaking. You can explore local villages, visit temples, or learn about traditional crafts. There's also the option for some serious chill time. I spent one afternoon just reading in a hammock, listening to the sounds of the jungle. Pure bliss. Seriously, I don't think I've been that relaxed in YEARS. It's also a good way to detox from social media.
Weather: Sunshine and rainbows, or potential for torrential downpours? (Pack accordingly, people!)
Ah, the weather. Ingiriya is relatively humid, and you're in a tropical climate. Expect sunshine. Expect rain. Sometimes, you'll get both in the same hour. Bring light, breathable clothing. And definitely pack a rain jacket. Or even better, a poncho. I learned this the hard way. I got caught in a monsoon on a hike and looked like a drowned rat. Not a good look. But hey, it's nature! Embrace the unpredictability! And the mud. So. Much. Mud.
Is it safe? Any dodgy vibes I should be aware of? (I need to know!)
Ingiriya felt safe. The locals are incredibly friendly and welcoming. Of course, you should always be mindful of your belongings, and it's always smart to be cautious in unfamiliar places. But I felt genuinely safe and supported during my stay. The only "dodgy vibes" I got were from my own internal monologue telling me I wasn't good enough at yoga.
Best part of the trip? (Go on, gush!)
Okay, fine, I'll gush. The best part? The *people*. The staff were unbelievably kind and helpful. The other guests? We became a little family. We shared stories, laughed until our stomachs hurt, and supported each other through our various (and sometimes hilarious) adventures. I still remember the moment when we all got stuck in a small shop because of the storm. We spent like Mountain Stay
